Something Cute To Share

I recieved this in an email from a friend. I thought you all would enjoy it. Besides everyone needs a good chuckle every once in awhile, right!

Why We Love Our Children!!

A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he'd
found a cat, but it was dead. "How do you
know that the cat was dead?" she asked him.
"Because I pissed in its ear and it didn't
move," answered the child innocently. "You did
WHAT?!!" the teacher exclaimed in surprise.
"You know," explained the boy, "I leaned over
and went 'Pssst!' and it didn't move."

A little girl goes to the barber shop with her
father. She stands next to the barber chair,
while her dad gets his hair cut, eating a snack
cake. The barber says to her, "Sweetheart,
you're gonna get hair on your Twinkie." She
says, "Yes, I know, and I'm also gonna get boobs,too."

An exasperated mother, whose son was always
getting into mischeif, finally asked him, "How do you
expect to get into Heaven?" The boy thought it
over and said, "Well, I'll runin and out and in and out
and keep slamming the door until St. Peter says,
'For Heaven's sake, Dylan, come in or stay out!'"

One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm
a mother was tucking her son into bed. She was
about to turn off the light when he asked with a
tremow in his voice, :Mommy will you sleep with me
tonight?" The mother smiled and gave him a
reasurring hug. "I can't dear," she said. "I have to
sleep in Daddy's room." A long silence was broken
at last by his shaky little voice: "The big sissy."

It was that time, during the Sunday morning service,
for the children's sermon. All the children were
invited to come forward. One little girl was
wearing a particularly pretty dress and, as she sat
down, the pastor leaned over and said, "That is a
very pretty dress. Is it your Easter Dress?"
The little girls replied, directly into the pastor's
clip-on microphone, "Yes, and Mom says it's a
b*tch to iron."

When I was six months pregnant with my third
child, my three year-old came into the room as I
was preparing to get into the shower. She said,
"Mommy, you are getting fat!" I replied, "Yes
honey, remember Mommy has a baby growing in her
tummy." "I know," she replied, "but what's
growing in your butt?"

One day a first grade teacher was reading the
story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to
the part where Chicken Little warns the farmer.
She read, "...and Chicken Little went up to the farmer
and said, "The sky is falling!" The teacher then asked
the class, "And what do you think the farmer said?"
One little girl raised her hand and said, "I think he
said: "Holy sh*t! A talking chicken!" The teacher was
unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.

That's why we LOVE our children!!